Poster // MGI Films via IMDb
‘You see, temperature…you see…sound…’: reviewing “Mold” (2022)
By: Magnus Blanchard-Rockhill
Staff-Writer & Advertising Co-Manager
This review contains spoilers for the entirety of “Mold” (2022).
Zombie movies are not my favorite subgenre of horror. I like them just fine, and I’ve watched a few, but I don’t go out of my way to find them. That said, I like to think I know what makes them enjoyable. And whatever it is that makes zombie movies enjoyable…“Mold” (2022) does not have that. The Crum Brothers have disappointed me.
A strong ensemble cast is what makes a lot of zombie movies tick. Zombies are not an antagonist that can carry a movie, and they function more as a force of nature even if they aren’t moving in a big crowd. Seeing that “Mold” takes place in an apartment building, it seems like a perfect fit: the ideal environment to force a rag-tag team of people to fight some cool zombies in an enclosed space.
Unfortunately, this movie did not go in that direction. Instead, by the time we get halfway through, there are three characters all in separate locations who barely interact with each other and, in fact, barely interact with the two zombies. This is tragic because, in all honesty, the mold zombie designs are the coolest part of the film.
To summarize the plot: there is a man who lives in an apartment. His job seems to be a paranormal investigator, as far as I can tell. His girlfriend, Pricilla, is an artist and softball player. He watches one of her games one night while speaking to two of their neighbors, Brad and Larry – a couple that Pricilla is friends with, but that the main character hates. Know now that these are the only characters that matter to the plot at all, and outside of them, there are only four other even more minor roles.
When a…mold inspector, or something, comes to investigate, the mold attacks, and he is turned into a zombie. Pricilla finds out that Brad has been turned into a zombie too when she goes to visit him and Larry.
The rest of the movie is the main character in his and Pricilla’s apartment laying in a bathtub and breathing heavily, and then Larry and Pricilla wandering around Larry and Brad’s apartment and breathing heavily. Also the two zombies walking around and breathing heavily. Essentially no dialogue. Nothing happens at all.
Eventually they all start spraying soap on the zombies, I guess. It doesn’t work and they all die. The end. Time I’ll never get back. The trailer has more entertainment value, genuinely. None of the characters’ deaths made me feel anything in particular, because none of them are interesting. How are we only seeing four of the people who live in this apartment building? Why are we only seeing the two zombies when we know the entire building has been affected?
The acting is not the best but is endearingly cheesy. The lighting is not great, the camera is constantly shaking and the score is a horribly sad violin track that makes every scene as tonally confusing as possible. The writing feels insultingly childish. If you told me this was a movie made by a sixth-grade health class teacher to warn about the dangers of black mold, I would sigh in relief, because at least that would make sense.
I had never heard of this movie before and it seems that neither has anyone else. It had a total of three reviews on IMDb, which seem to have come to the conclusion: it’s ok. After last issue’s dud of a film, I was hoping this one would have more entertainment value, but unfortunately I have found nothing to defend here.
