“Every rose has its thorn”

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Poison and “The Notebook” need to get on the same level


Come Valentine’s Day, my social sphere splits right down the middle: the lovers and the haters of the “holiday.”

Boxes of chocolates and roses are all fun and games until two star-crossed lovers kill themselves in the name of passion and romance. (Or until someone watches “The Notebook” after a bottle of cheap wine. Alone.)

There are those who hate it because it is a Hallmark holiday, and those who love it because they always get a rose or seven.

As Poison aptly stated, “Every rose has its thorn.” Yes, that means that those in functioning relationships still have to work at it (and that things that are seemingly beautiful and soft can also hurt you), and it means that when you want something and don’t get it, there’s a pang of resentment.

Valentine’s Day is a Friday night this year. You know what anyone can do on Friday night? Pretty much anything. The world is your oyster. Whether you’re single, looking, polyamorous, open, closed, married…whatever. You can go to a movie, you can get carry-out, you can watch Bruce Lee flicks with your dog.

Me personally? I’ll be at a punk show with my boyfriend and some of our friends. See? Valentine’s Day can either resemble that scene from “Lady and the Tramp” with the piece of spaghetti, OR it can be loud music and a PBR (with a noticeable lack of hearing the morning after).

It doesn’t matter. It’s just another day that you can mold to whatever you want to do.

Nobody needs a thorn in their side, to worry about a bane of their existence, or the lack of something in their life. There isn’t a realistic moment for a Heath Ledger-beautiful man to pop out of the stands and start singing “Can’t Take My Eyes Off Of You” by Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons, with a marching band to match. Lloyd Dobler won’t make a stand with his boombox every time.

There are, however, moments you can make with people you love or by taking a night to love yourself. There are moments that come when you least expect them (and sometimes, just sometimes, Lloyd Dobler does show up).

So yes, Rose could have absolutely fit Jack on that door in the ocean after the Titanic sank. Don’t be Rose. Pull together this Valentine’s Day. Put as many friends on that door as you can fit. Don’t throw your heart to the bottom of the ocean.

Show love to your friends, to your family, to your favorite pets, your community, (your favorite columnist…), but mostly, show love to yourself. (Yes, absolutely buy yourself a big box of chocolate-covered bacon. You deserve it.)

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